Worry, fear, insecurity, trust, hurt, anxiety…
Every one of those words deals with thoughts. Lord knows I have a lot of thoughts. Not all of them are rational and actually lately, most of them would fall under the irrational category.
Whether it is worrying about my future… uncontrollable… I should know that from my past.
Fear of loss or the future… uncontrollable.
Insecure with not being good enough, smart enough, clean enough, strong enough.
Trust in others… uncontrollable.
Hurt from experiences… can’t change it.
Anxiety about all of the above.
I have been told I am wordy, I talk a lot, I think too much, I think differently… the list goes on, but you get the picture.
Well, any one who has ever told me this, is absolutely correct.
One other thing… controlling.
Since I was a boy, I have had this instinct to control. And because the way my brain works, I would draw up plans in my head… solutions… the ”right” idea or way.
Am I really smarter than the next guy?
Do I really have all the answers?
Am I really just that good?
Absolutely not. I am just like the next guy, who has few answers, and really just isn’t that good.
With the things I have been going through lately I have been racking my brain trying to figure out the answers. Yes, I pray and I seek His peace. I beg Him for help! Yet, I still have all of these fears, anxieties, hurts, and insecurities.
Time for change right?
By the grace of God, I think I have finally received the answer. *Note: I said ”received the answer.”
It can be summed up in one sentence…
”Turn it over to Him.”
It was several days ago and after thinking about casting all my anxieties and burdens on Him for the 400 billionth time, it was like I understood it. I can tell you it has ”almost” set me free. It was the answer I have been begging for and it did not come from this guy’s brain.
I have tried to solve my issues, make things right with others, help them, and nothing works… All it does is add pressure to all parties involved. I am not superman, I can not solve all of these issues, so why not let myself be free of it… it’s what He tells us to do right?
So for the past several days, I have been putting it into action. And by action, I mean actually doing less.
I actually experienced a few moments of a totally wiped out, clean, ”nothing going on”, brain. Like the lights shut off for a few moments. My heart calmed, my anger eased, my fear diminished, I just had no thoughts.
For anyone reading this that knows me, I know you have your doubts. I can honestly say it has happened.
I simply stop any thought. I pray and turn it over to Him. I let it go… to Him. As simple as that… I admit I don’t have the answer or even a clue of where to start, I understand He does, and then I hand that thought over to Him to solve. I trust Him.
That thought could be a simple anxiety or the search for a solution to ”make something right” or ”let something go.”
Its about ”letting it be.” Just let things ”be.”
He knows the plan He has for me right? Well, here, let me get out of the way.
All of this is easier said than done, but practice makes perfect right? And what better practice than literally letting yourself do nothing.
Instead of ”letting it go”, turn it over to Him, let Him ”let it go” for you. Instead of figuring out how to ”make things right”, let Him ”make it right.”
Its all too much work for me, I have better things to do than worry about how to stop worrying so much.
1 Peter 5:7
”Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
I really think He can handle it.
Gabe
One Comment